#i might not feel AS negative as i do if they changed a little bit left out a few lines and left that one deleted scene

[thecircularsystem]

How to Individualize Safely

As someone who has found a lot of benefit from distinguishing my parts, and accepting ourselves as individual people… I have also found it difficult to do this safely, myself! Back in the day, we individualized ourselves so much that we grew to resent our system, and it really hurt our ability to integrate — but going to the complete 180 to treating ourselves only as fragmented parts of a single personality hurt us as well.

Individualization can be incredibly helpful for integration, as we have since learned, so I wanted to share my perspective on how to reduce the potential harm that could arise. By no means should this be taken in such a way as to suggest that individualization is always harmful, or always risky. I have just found it to be such with my own system. Equally, this advice is just what worked for my system; your mileage may vary, as recovery will always depend on the individual / system!

Unfortunately, this guide is incredibly long, and not very easy to summarize for ease of access. My apologies to those who struggle with large blocks of text.

General Reminders for Safety and Success

Compromise is Key

In every relationship, you must find balance. This is where my system struggled the most in the early days. If we agree that every part is their own person, then there will naturally be conflict due to sharing the same body for our existence. After all, we can't decide to do everything we want with the body; we have to come to a compromise. So, work on discussing with your system what you want to do. How can you reach compromises with who you, collectively, present as? How can you communicate your desires and needs? Some methods we used were mental grounding, journaling, notes, etc. We found a lot of success on using post-it notes -- often explaining them to our family as "writing notes about characters." I would highly recommend the round-table discussion technique! (That is two links!)

Part of compromise is understanding that you cannot get everything exactly how you want it; but by sacrificing just a little bit, you gain equilibrium and acceptance of ones self alongside balance with others around you.

Follow Through

If you agree with your parts to make changes for them -- buy new clothes for them, do some sort of body modification to help them feel more themselves, etc -- follow through. You have to stick to your word if you're ever going to trust yourself, and if they ever want to trust you. You can't just not do the things you agreed upon. If you find issue with a compromise after the fact, you MUST discuss that and come to a new conclusion that is better for all parties. If the decision cannot be reversed, then you will need to work together to comfort the negative feelings.

Remember, though, that consent can be revoked. Maybe before you get that tattoo you agreed on, you now realize that you’re terrified and can’t. Discuss this somehow! Let them know the detriment it would cause. Come to new conclusions that might be effective, even if not quite "ideal" -- can a tattoo be replaced with a marker drawing or tattoo sleeve art? There's a lot of compromises that can be made.

Treat Each Other Equitably, Not Equally

We have some parts who nearly never front. Would they feel more comfortable in certain clothing? Yes! But the clothing they like is either too expensive or rarely going to be worn, and we have a limited budget for clothing. Since they never really front, it's not a priority. However, one part who doesn't front as often, but is desperately needed, likes cheaper clothing that looks nice. Much of our closet is dedicated to her, because it's affordable. And large portions of our closet are dedicated to parts who enjoy fronting and are out more -- we spend the most money on parts like myself, who front for months at a time.

This is not equal treatment of parts. Treating ourselves equally would come at incredible detriment to our wallet, in this specific example, but in many others as well. Part of compromise and individualization is understanding that, as different people, you're going to require different needs to be met. Don't try to even things out; have open and honest conversations about equity in your system.

Be Prepared For Mistakes

As we worked on individualizing more, we made the decision (after years of deliberation) to cut our hair completely. I was excited for this; as a part who fronts constantly and needed to feel more masculine, it was the best I've felt in this body. Soon after this, a very feminine part fronted. We had spoken with her and agreed prior to the haircut that this was an acceptable compromise. However, when she switched in, she had a complete mental breakdown about the loss of her long hair, so much so that she struggled to return to front for months afterward.

The response was unexpected, but it's something you must be prepared for. Sometimes we don't know how we'll feel when something about us changes; sometimes we think we're ready for a big change and consent to it, but it turns out we were wrong. You need to be prepared to comfort parts who may become distressed.

One Size Does Not Fit All

Some of the tips I share may help. Some of them may hurt. Not every system is alike, and not every system will find benefit or harm from the things another system may find beneficial or harmful! If you are worried about individualizing in a particular way, my suggestion is to deliberate on it further with your system. Communicate and discuss your hesitations; try to find balance with one another and understand where your distress may be coming from.

And remember: you have survived this much. It will be okay if you try something and it doesn't work out; it's okay to hurt because you took a risk. This is the dignity of risk; you are able to make choices for your system and choices about your well-being.

How Do I Actually Individualize?

Now onto the meat of this post, actual tips and guidance for breaking things up more and strengthening the personality of parts. Here are tips that helped us. I'm also going to include how each one of these tips helped us integrate further.

Sign Offs

I highly recommend this as a trick to individualize. Funny enough, the standard method I've seen (writing your name at the bottom of a post) does not help me; it feels too formal. Instead, we sign off our posts with creative tag-lines we developed ourselves. For instance, I utilize the sign off "Armageddon Comes While I'm Sleeping," because I am a chronically exhausted part who struggles with taking action, leading to problems. I enjoyed that symbolism!

You can use names, emojis, tag-lines like us -- or some other system you find helpful. We find the most benefit from signing off on posts like these, but I've also seen individuals utilize sign-offs for other things as well.

Integration Benefit: Seeing which part wrote what helped us to understand who was struggling, particularly as they signed off on the private vent blog we have. They couldn't hide their feelings -- they made the active choice not to hide those feelings, because we are working together as a team of people, now. This allowed us to seek out struggling parts and comfort, compromise, and coordinate with them, specifically. This has led to far more ease of integration.

Proxy Bots

This is a tip that did not help me; proxy bots such as Pluralkit and Simply Plural are used often in Discord servers. They allow an individual account to use multiple usernames as proxies, making it so an individual account can post as multiple users.

For us, proxy bots encouraged too much individualization, leading to heightened dissociation. However, this was years ago when we had less connection to one another, and I would be tempted to try again now that I have learned the safety tips I mentioned above.

Integration Benefit: Many systems find that proxying allows them to see parts they didn't know existed, due to amnesia barriers. Similarly to sign offs, proxying allows systems to seek out struggling parts.

Wardrobe and Accessories

We have a collection of scarves that different parts can wear, depending on who is fronting. We have shirts and dresses and pants that are certain parts favorite outfits. We have jewelry that is part-specific. We have packers of numerous sizes to accommodate for various parts and their comfort.

Wearing these things helps parts feel more like themselves. We feel more at home in our own body and can shape ourselves how we appear. We do need to moderate ourselves some -- we can't go buying Ve entire angel wings, but we can get t-shirts that reference angels to help her feel more like herself.

Integration Benefit: Feeling comfortable fronting helped parts understand what others were going through, fronting for longer periods of time. It also made them more willing to compromise on other things (i.e. "If I can wear a packer, then we don't need to get bottom surgery, which will make the girls feel more listened to").

Playlist Crafting

Some of our parts have wildly different music tastes! We have a collection of spotify and youtube playlists for different parts. This way, when we drive, we can listen to music that makes us happy. Some of our parts even have multiple playlists.

Integration Benefit: There's been a lot of these honestly. Our song history helped us see who frequently fronted when we struggled to remember; listening to other parts playlists helped us understand what they were feeling or thinking; putting the songs all into one huge Circular Playlist helped us identify more clearly specific fronting triggers and work through trauma together. The list goes on!

Individual and Adapted Hobbies

This was actually suggested and reinforced by my therapist. Our protector, Numb, began to feel aimless, as he no longer had his chess game (aka, planning every interaction to its fullest extent to ensure we didn't get hurt) to occupy his mind, due to us being out of an abusive environment. He felt powerless and like he was going to slip into dormancy due to a lack of need to exist. My therapist encouraged him to consider what he enjoyed; from there, he could find growth through hobbies. Rather than leaving us, he could adapt and change, just like the rest of us.

Numb very much enjoys article reviews and reading. We developed the innerworld to contain a study where he can watch over our containers of memories while he enjoys his books.

There's hundreds of other examples. As a part, I'm a gamer, but Curtis is more musically inclined, whereas the kids focus more on physical toys and puzzles. Sierra loves doing her hair while Debra loves food. Emory is our biggest D&D nerd -- predictably.

We also share hobbies, but tackle them in different -- adapted -- ways. For instance, we all enjoy writing. But Numb enjoys purple-prose focused emotional work, whereas Curtis loves dialogue, whereas certain parts like to share what they write on our 18+ blog instead. Even when we write the same things, we write them differently.

Integration Benefit: Having individual hobbies helped us feel safe. It helped us to understand that we could grow past the trauma that led us to existing; we could become our own uniquely beautiful people and our trauma could not hold us down. This led to us being able to work through our trauma and communicate better than ever.

Being Yourself, Loudly

I mean offline. I understand that this is unsafe for many individuals, and as I've said numerous times -- these do not apply to every system ever. But for us, being known by the name we go by and being able to be openly a system of parts has helped us extensively with individualization and healing.

Our friends and family all use our correct names and pronouns when we are fronting (for the most part; family struggles some). We have in our bio and intro on servers -- even those that are not system based -- that we are a DID system. We have told numerous coworkers and far more strangers.

Integration Benefit: As with many of the above, this is all about our comfort in our own body. Feeling comfortable, safe, and loved has been the number one healer of our trauma. Being myself loudly allows me to be, well, myself -- in all my glory.

I hope that this made sense! It's now midnight for me and I'm quite tired, so I'll just post what I have. Thank you all and goodnight <3

[cacw]

captain america the first avenger is my friend

[wayfinderships]

Hmmmm...

[orcelito]

Had a moment of "Why do I feel so melancholy haha" and then I remembered that my uncle literally died yesterday

I've been compartmentalizing like crazy I guess

[lynleaf]

gif from

coping and caring for littles with RSD!

what is rsd?

(r)ejection (s)ensitivy (d)ysphoria is an experience of intense emotional pain caused by perceived failure or rejection. in short, it is a heightened sensitivity to rejection. this condition is linked to adhd because it is believed to stem from disregulation of rejection-related emotions and behavior. although it is linked to adhd, it can also come from other forms of neurodivergency, ptsd, bpd, and other conditions.

in littles, this can look like:

🍀 intense negative reactions to angry, indifferent, dismissive, or annoyed tones of voice directed at them

🍀 overperceiving or "inventing" threats around them, can lead to heightened anxiety or sudden mood changes

🍀 adverse reactions to having structured caretaking (a.k.a "firm hands"), being told what to do, or being disciplined

and can result in:

🍀 fussy littles

🍀 emotional and physical shut downs or social withdrawal

🍀 outbursts, tantrums, or fits

🍀 negative self-talk, rumination, and defensiveness

if you are a little with rsd, here are some ways to manage (even while regressed)!

- giving yourself positive affirmations

"i did nothing wrong", "they are not upset with me", "i am loved and seen", "my opinion is valued and i matter"

- counteract your immediate response to perceived negativity. if someone says something in a rude tone, think of other possible reasons they may be upset.

"they are not upset because of something i did. they might not be feeling well, they might be having a bad day, or they might be stressed or tired right now. the way they reacted to me is not my fault"

- write down what happened, how it made you feel, and some ways you can make yourself feel better

- think about what is in your control and what is out of your control

e.g. you cannot control someone else's emotions, but you can control your breathing

calm your amygdala

- take big deep breaths

- practice identifying something in each of your senses

"what can i hear, what can i see, what can i smell, what can i taste, what can i feel"

- remove yourself from the situation if you can

take a brain break, go to a quieter location, watch a video of something you love, listen to a song that calms you

- hug your plushies!

- use a pacifier or chew toy

if you are a carer for a little with rsd:

- be patient! your small may not be able to idenitify why they are feeling or reacting this way in the moment. sit with them and don't rush them as they process their emotions

- if they are being fussy or verbally combative, it is valid to feel overwhelmed or stressed. remember that above all else, you are in control of your body and how you choose to respond. keep your voice level, avoid using aggressive language, speak gently, and reinforce positive talk

- ask them how they are feeling and listen to them. let them explain their emotions, even if they seem irrational. what they feel is real to them! validate their feelings

- help your little figure out ways of coping that work for them. give them options

"do you need some quiet time alone to calm down? would you like for me to hold you? how about we watch your favorite show? or we can play something together! you can pick!"

this is something that i have struggled with all my life, and it seems to be heightened when i'm regressed. i hope this helped others struggling or who know someone struggling, at least a little bit! <3

if you have rsd, remember:

the people in your life want you to be there. your friends care about you! you are not a bad person because you made a mistake. everything you do doesn't have to be perfect, you are human! and you are deserving of love no matter what. <3

[luveline]

would you ever write a ditsy!reader with sirius? where he's grumpy and she's just giggly and makes him feel a little less grumpy? I love you and your writing sending kisses <3

I love you

Fuck’s sake. Sirius glares at the TV. Fuck off. 

“What’s it say?” you call from the kitchen. 

“It’s raining all weekend.” 

“No way, really?” You appear with a tea towel in your hands, wiping your fingers dry one at a time. “Shit, sorry, baby. I guess we better get out our rain ponchos.” 

Sirius loves concerts, but he hates shitty weather. “What if they cancel?” 

“I don’t think they’ll cancel.” You put the tea towel on the coffee table and gesture for him to do something. What it is you want is unclear, but Sirius leans back, and, as usual, you make yourself at home in his lap. Gentle but not shy. “We might get a bit muddy, is all.” 

You rest your ribs half on his chest and half against the sofa. This close, he can confess to finding you the kind of beautiful that makes his jaw ache. Being around you is like a constant re-realisation that you’re his amazing girl, his one good love, as he likes to put it. Romance has never felt more real to him than when he’s with you, slipping his arm behind your back, and letting your nose at his jawline. Then the man on TV says the area is at risk of thunder and lightning on Saturday and he forgets to be in love. 

“Fucking hell,” he complains, clinging to you as though you have the power to change what the weatherman has to say. 

“It won’t be as bad as you’re thinking,” you sing-song back. 

“No, we’ll be turned to husks when we’re struck by lightning, but I’m sure it’ll be great.” 

“So negative,” you murmur, drawing along his collar. 

“I’m being realistic, lovely, our weekend is completely ruined.” 

“That’s not true, is it? Your weekend is ruined. Mine is the same as it was, because I don’t care if it rains on Metallica, I just want to spend time with you.” 

“You’re such a dick,” he says through a soft laugh. 

“Why? Because I am clearly the more loving partner?” you tease. 

“Yes. Because I don’t care about you at all, I only care about the concert, and spending time with you means nothing to me.” 

“Oh, well when you put it like that,” you murmur, leaning in to kiss his neck softly. Short presses of your lips with the faintest of sounds, then you're giggling. He’s glad you can’t see his face. You’d run with the honeyed smile he wears now. He would never hear the end of it. 

“I’ll have to find your anorak,” he says, rubbing a loving path down your back. 

“We’ll get the thermals out of the attic. Don’t worry, baby, the rain won’t ruin all your fun.” You kiss him again, and laugh like you’ve made a joke he isn’t privy to. 

“What’s funny?” he asks. 

“I just love you when you’re mad.” 

“I’m not mad.” 

“Aggrieved, then.” You lift your face only to hold his and press your nose to his cheek. You move your face back and forth, like a hurried nuzzling. “You’re such a downer.” 

“Stop it.” 

“Make me,” you say through giggles. 

He closes his eyes and turns in for a proper kiss. 

[xxsinisterbunniexx]

Dating/ Relationship headcannons for eyeless jack? For female reader, please! Thank you!

Haha so like believe it or not I’ve started writing dating headcanons shortly after posting my general NSFW headcanons…. And then I got distracted

Also um so like me when I said I was gonna answer a bunch of requests over spring break and then proceeded to not answer a single one after that…. SO YEAH IM WORKING ON IT

Anyways…

𓆩♡𓆪 Creepypasta boys dating headcanons 𓆩♡𓆪

+love languages as a bonus

Characters: Jeff the Killer, Ticci Toby, Eyeless Jack, BEN drowned, X Virus, Tim/Masky, Brian/Hoodie

Jeff the Killer

☠︎︎ physical touch, he’s very used to touch being used in a negative way, towards him or by him so soft touches would make him melt

☠︎︎ likes to have you in his lap

☠︎︎ like wdym you need a chair he’s right here???

☠︎︎ he flirts with you by being sarcastic and snarky ☠︎︎ so like you might think he hates you at first before you realize he has a crush on you

☠︎︎ not great with his words/expressing his feelings

☠︎︎ you’d need to have thick skin to be with him, because he will definitely say things he doesn’t mean during an argument

☠︎︎ and he LIKES to argue, so if you hate conflict he’s probably not for you

☠︎︎ jealous and a bit possessive too, so you’d have to be careful about how you talk to other people and how often you do so

☠︎︎ he needs a LOT of reassurance and attention but he won’t ask for it directly, he’ll just get snappy and mean without an explanation

☠︎︎ it’s not always obvious why he’s upset so he’d need to be with someone who is both perceptive and patient

☠︎︎ he’s not the best at figuring out why you’re upset, so direct communication is best for him

☠︎︎ ride or die tbh, he doesn’t like very many people so if you’ve somehow wooed him you ain’t ever getting away

Ticci Toby

✘ touchtouchtouch

✘ he can’t feel pain or temperature so he values the things he can feel

✘ his hands are always on you in some capacity

✘ he’ll have his arm around you, he’ll hold your hand, and he LOVES it when you hold his arm

✘ he’ll also bear hug you and pick you up whenever he sees you (and he expects you to run into his arms)

✘ kinda OBNOXIOUS lol, like he’s the type of bf who does shit to annoy you just because he likes to see you get all riled up

✘ pokes your nose, licks your face, bites you, anything to get your attention

✘ no press is bad press

✘ the way he expresses love and affection is… unconventional

✘ like will sometimes just be so over the top and cannot read the situation

✘ he’d be very blunt in how he feels about you and generally is uninhibited when speaking about his feelings

✘ This can sometimes lead to issues so would need thick skin if you’re gonna date him

✘ he’s spontaneous and super energetic so you either need to be someone who can match that energy or super go with the flow

✘ has trouble seeing things from your perspective sometimes, but in an argument he doesn’t get all heated he just shuts down

✘ so he’d definitely do better with someone who’s not very temperamental

✘He’s a wild ride but if you can be down with all he’s got going on, he’ll stay in a long term relationship

Eyeless Jack

𖤐 gifts! He would definitely be bringing you back little trinkets

𖤐 it could be fun and pretty things he’s found while he’s out or little snacks/your favorite drink, etc

𖤐 just anything he can bring you to show you he was thinking of you

𖤐 treats you like you are dainty because he’s scared of breaking you

𖤐 he loves so gently

𖤐 makes sure you know you are valued by him

𖤐 regularly tells you he loves you, that you’re beautiful, he appreciates you

𖤐 plans the cutest dates and really likes to take you out

𖤐 the dates would be super tailored to what you’re into

𖤐 arguments are more like open discussions and he genuinely wants to help you change and grow as a person

𖤐 he’s a bit protective and only slightly jealous, no more than anyone else really

𖤐 he doesn’t want to hold you back in anyway really so he doesn’t often tell you what to do

𖤐 he would do best with someone who’s softer and less judgmental, he has a lot of shame around his eating habits and feeling like a monster

𖤐 he tends to give more than he takes so he’d do better with someone who’s also very generous that way there’d be equal dynamics between you two

BEN drowned

⚠︎ quality time, but not so much in the way of just liking to be around, he likes if you actually make plans to see him, even if it’s just to hang out

⚠︎ loves to play video games with you and he gets competitive

⚠︎ somewhat like Toby he is a little shit!

⚠︎ like he just LOVES to annoy the fuck out of you

⚠︎ he just thinks you’re wayyyy too cute when you’re angry

⚠︎ really likes to show off who he’s with

⚠︎ will buy you clothes, makeup, etc really anything to doll you up and show you off

⚠︎ once you are official he will be telling everyone in the existence of ever

⚠︎ especially because…

⚠︎ he’s SUPER POSSESSIVE like oh god HE’S SICK

⚠︎ like if someone LOOKS at you a little too long he’s got a problem

⚠︎ god forbid someone hits on you

⚠︎ but rather than taking it up with you, he just secretly ruins their life

⚠︎ he may not always be the best partner, he can lack empathy at times and arguments with him are a nightmare because he will twist your words and may manipulate you lightly

⚠︎ will randomly come through when it really matters

⚠︎ would do better with someone who’s (and forgive me here for my choice of word) a bit tsundere-like

⚠︎ he likes someone who takes effort to win over because he loves the chase

⚠︎ he also likes if you’re easy to embarrass or get a reaction out of

⚠︎ your relationship will feel like constant push and pull

X Virus

☣︎ acts of service

☣︎ Cody is a problem solver and will do what he can to make you happy and help you when there’s things troubling you

☣︎ at the same time, he has periods where he gets really invested into what he’s studying and may not pay attention to you for days

☣︎ so if you’re caring and will support him while he gets like that >>>>

☣︎ like bringing him food, helping with his laundry, etc (daily tasks he would need to do but he’s too hyper focused to take care of himself)

☣︎ you may have to convince him to shower during these periods

☣︎ would likely be pretty inexperienced in romance

☣︎ would defo be one of those guys that gets exponentially hotter after getting a girlfriend because she teaches him how to dress and be presentable

☣︎ rambles on about his experiments so you would ideally be a good listener and someone who will engage with him even if you have no idea what he’s talking about

☣︎ not super jealous but has CRAZY accurate senses when it comes to someone actually liking you and subtly flirting with you

☣︎ it’s like a siren goes off in his brain and then he’s like “not that person”

☣︎ pussy whippedddddd like once he’s into you you’ve got him on his KNEES

☣︎ got him opening doors and carrying heavy stuff like shittttttt

Tim/Masky

꩜ acts of service

꩜ Tim is not always the best with his words and can be kind of awkward so he’d rather just do things to show he cares

꩜ protective almost in like a dad way, like would make sure your car had all the fluids and maintenance it needs (can u tell I know nothing about cars)

꩜ or you’d randomly mention something you want and it’ll magically appear

꩜ he’s very practical, so dates and anniversaries are not too over the top, he keeps it simple

꩜ he’d do best with someone who’s more chill and laid back

꩜ he’s slow to open up and not the best at discussing his feelings so someone who is patient & perceptive is better for him

꩜ if it’s cold he always wants you to take his jacket (also loves to see you in it)

꩜Chivalry ain’t dead while he’s around

꩜ doesn’t get jealous often, he’s pretty mature

꩜ he’s very closed off and secretive about the parts of his life that he’s not proud of, so he’d need to be with someone who’s comfortable with not knowing everything

꩜ this also means it would take you a while to meet Masky

☆ Masky isn’t around all that often so you won’t get a ton of attention from him

☆ he views you as more of a pet than a girlfriend

☆ will give you the occasional head pat or say something flirtatious which often borders on sexual harassment

Brian/Hoodie

𖣐 words of affirmation

𖣐 he likes to be told that he is valued!

𖣐 but also loves to compliment you, and he is quite charming

𖣐 LOVES to tease

𖣐 he’s constantly taking pictures of you or recording you

𖣐has a picture of you in his wallet

𖣐 writes you little love notes and hides them in places you’ll find them easily

𖣐 he’s really perceptive so you can’t easily hide your feelings around him

𖣐 he will call bullshit if you try to say “no, I’m not mad” because he KNOWS

𖣐 not really jealous at all tbh

𖣐 if someone hits on you he takes it as a compliment

𖣐 like yeah he knows you’re hot

☹ You don’t see Hoodie for a while

☹ because lowkey he acts like a stalker at first even though you’re dating Brian and therefore also him

☹ he wouldn’t just come up and approach you, he has to be a weirdo and watch you from the shadows

☹ like just come talk to me you freak

☹ he will also leave you letters but they’re a little more sinister than Brian’s and in places that are off putting

☹ eventually he’d approach you, but like Masky he more so sees you as something to toy with rather than a girlfriend (even though his affection for you is definitely deep in there somewhere)

Hope you enjoyed :3

[psychoticallykind]

Baby

"Baby" - Jegulus Microfics - @into-the-jeggyverse - 617 words

Warnings: Trans Regulus with threatened pregnancy, period in trans character.

--------------------------------------------------------------

James came home with a weird feeling in his chest, opening the front door a little quieter than usual. "Regulus?"

The kitchen and living room were empty, but Regulus's jacket was still hanging up where it had been this morning. James dropped his keys on the kitchen counter, taking a few seconds to grab a water bottle before he continued searching for his fiance. "Reg? Hey, love, are you home?"

The hall bathroom was empty, and the library, and the bedroom.

The ensuite bathroom, however - James felt his heart drop as he approached the door, knocking gently. "Reg? Hey, are you okay? I have this feeling - nevermind."

"I'm fine," Regulus called back, but his voice was thick with tears.

James bit his lip. "Can I open the door?"

There was a short pause, and then, "Okay."

James opened the door slowly. Regulus was sitting on the closed toilet seat, so James knelt in front of him. "Hey." He lifted a hand, tracing over tear tracks. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Regulus mumbled. He took a deep breath, and then mumbled something under his breath.

James nodded. "I didn't hear that, but take this." He opened the bottle before handing it over. "And maybe try again?"

Regulus took a small sip of the water. His eyes were somewhere on the floor as he whispered, "It was late."

"What was late?" James asked.

"My -" Regulus made a face, gesturing down. "Blood. Monthly. You know."

"Oh," James realized. "I'm sorry. Did it come today? Do you need painkillers? A bath? I can run you one."

"No, that's -" Regulus broke off, smiling a little. "That would be nice, but that's not why I'm a mess, Jamie. I thought I might be -" Regulus stopped again, grimacing. "I can't say it. I'll throw up."

James nodded, not understanding quite yet. He rubbed gentle circles on Regulus's thighs. "You don't have to. It's okay."

Regulus picked up the trash can and tilted it. "Look."

James obediently looked in the trash can, frowning in confusion as he spotted - "Are those pregnancy tests?"

Regulus squeezed his eyes shut, nodding once. "Mhm."

"Oh." James nodded again, processing. "And..." He took another second. "And they're negative."

Regulus swallowed. "Are - nope." He tilted his head back, looking up at the ceiling. "Are you disappointed?"

James blinked. "What?"

"Disappointed," Regulus repeated. "That I'm not - that I don't want - that."

"No," James said vehemently. He brought one hand to the back of Regulus's head, gently urging him to look back down. "Love, no. Absolutely not. I would absolutely never ask that of you."

Regulus nodded, tipping his head back down but still not quite meeting James's eyes. "You don't want a baby?"

"You're enough for me," James promised. "We talked about this, remember? I wouldn't be here if I wasn't okay with this. You don't want kids, and I don't need them. I just need you."

"What -" Regulus swallowed again. "What if I changed my mind?"

Hesitant grey eyes met James's own. "Not - not having one. I never want to have one. Biologically, I mean. But - but maybe raising one? With you? We could do that. If you wanted."

James felt his head tilt as he tried to work that out. "You want a child?"

"No." Regulus bit his lip. "Maybe." He took a quick breath. "Yes."

James nodded slowly, thinking it over. "Okay. If you want one, then I'm all for it, love. Absolutely."

Regulus grinned. "Really?"

"Really," James promised. He stood up. "I'm going to run you a bath, and grab you some painkillers, and we can talk more about this if you want. Yes?"

"Yes," Regulus agreed, still beaming.

James grinned back. "And drink some more of that water, please."

[im-so-normal-iswear]

Jealous triple s, and how they deal with it, would they be insecure? Would they be unbothered?

take your time!

Jealous Sonic, Shadow, and Silver x Reader

Sonic:

Sonic’s confidence is one of his most defining traits, but when he gets jealous, that cool, carefree demeanor takes a serious hit. He’s usually so sure of himself, it’s part of his charm. But when someone else starts vying for your attention? That’s when cracks begin to show.

It starts small. You’re chatting with someone else, and Sonic catches sight of your laugh, the way your eyes light up. He doesn’t like how that person leans in a little too close or how their hand lingers just a moment too long. Sonic doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s... uncomfortable.

"Hey, Y/N!" Sonic’s voice cuts through the conversation, loud and bright. He zips up to your side, arm slinging around your shoulder in an overly casual gesture. "Whatcha talkin’ about? Anything cool, or is it just boring stuff?"

He flashes his signature grin, it sidnt reach his eyes tho as he just stared at them. The other person gets the hint, offering a polite excuse to leave, and Sonic is immediately all over you.

"Phew! Thought I’d have to rescue you from that snoozefest." He laughs, but his eyes linger on your face, searching. "You’re not, like, too close with them, are you?"

If you call him out on his jealousy, he’ll deny it, waving it off with a sheepish chuckle. "Jealous? Me? Nah, I’m way too cool for that." Before speeding away to not have to deal with his problems.

Despite his bravado, Sonic can’t help but feel a little insecure. What if he’s not enough? He’s fast, adventurous, and fun, but is that all you see him as? These thoughts are fleeting, though, because Sonic doesn’t like to dwell on negativity. He’s quick to bounce back, reminding himself that no one can match his charm.

When his jealousy peaks, he doubles down on his efforts to impress you. He’ll drag you on adventures, race you to the nearest horizon, and show off every trick in his arsenal. Sonic wants to be the one who keeps you smiling, even if it means pushing himself a little harder to outshine everyone else.

Shadow:

Shadow’s jealousy is a bit more on the intense side. He’s not one to wear his emotions on his sleeve, far from it, but he lets himself relax more around you, he valies you for that.

He notices everything, the way someone’s eyes linger on you, the subtle changes in their tone, and how easily they make you laugh. Shadow doesn’t say anything at first, but his silence speaks volumes. His eyes narrow, his body language stiffens, and the air around him grows thick with tension.

"Do you enjoy their company?" he asks you one evening, his tone calm but icy. It’s not an accusation, but the question seemed like a trap.

If you assure him that you’re just being polite or that it’s nothing serious, Shadow nods, but the thought lingers in his mind. He doesn’t understand why it bothers him so much, why the thought of others spending more time with you makes him ache.

Shadow isn’t one to act out of insecurity, but jealousy brings out a possessive streak he can’t quite control. He’s not above making his presence known, standing just a little too close to you when someone else is around or fixing them with a withering glare that sends them running.

"0You don’t need them," he tells you firmly, his voice low. "You have me."

Shadow’s jealousy stems from his fear of losing the one person who makes him feel "human",(mobian? Idfk anymore man :(.) grounded. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he worries that someone else might give you something he can’t. After all, he’s not the most expressive or affectionate person, and sometimes he wonders if that’s enough for you.

If you reassure him, Shadow relaxes, his usually stone cold exterior softening. "I don’t want to lose you," he admits quietly, almost ashamed of his own weakness.

While Shadow tries to keep his jealousy in check, it occasionally slips out in subtle ways.

Silver:

Silver is naturally anxious, and jealousy only amplifies that side of him. He’s not used to navigating these kinds of emotions, so when he sees someone else getting a little too friendly with you, he doesn’t know how to handle it.

At first, Silver tries to ignore it, convincing himself that he’s overreacting. "They’re just being nice," he tells himself, but the knot in his stomach says otherwise. He starts overthinking everything, what if they’re better for you? What if you realize he’s not enough?

You notice how quiet he gets, his usual bright demeanor overshadowed by uncertainty. When you ask him what’s wrong, he hesitates before blurting out, "Do you like them more than me?"

Silver immediately regrets his words, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "Sorry, I didn’t mean to-! I just... I don’t want to lose you."

His honesty is endearing, even if his jealousy is a little misplaced. Silver doesn’t want to control you or keep you from talking to others, but he can’t help feeling like he has to prove himself.

If his jealousy gets the better of him, Silver might become a bit clingy, always wanting to be by your side. "Can I stay with you for a bit?" he asks, his voice soft and hopeful.

Silver’s jealousy isn’t rooted in possessiveness but in his fear of not being good enough. He looks up to you, admires you, and sometimes he wonders what you see in him. But your reassurance means the world to him.

"You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me," Silver says one day. "I just want to make sure I’m the best for you, too."

[rotagnus]

crush pick a pile ---<3 🪷

for those who are lovelorn.

trust your gut--top row is 1-3, bottom 4-6. if none speak to you, this reading is not for you, do not force it.

as always, i will be blunt in my reading. if it does not resonate, do not force it.

this is a detailed reading, including a song and signs.

pile 1--knight of cups, death, 5 of wands.

this person seems to be the knight in shining armor for you. they're probably very witty, and i have the feeling for majority of you you're asking about a man. he has very well-balanced energy--he is not afraid to be sensitive, and he's very emotionally apt. he may be a little bit silly. this person probably has darker features--dark hair, maybe a darker skin tone. their eyes may be significant for a lot of you. as for their feelings, i believe they are assessing their situation right now. for a good amount of you, they have an inkling about your feelings but are afraid of being egotistic or just plain wrong. they're strategizing the situation--they're a very goal oriented person, and they're trying to figure out what the next step is. good news is that you can sit back and let them decide instead of chasing. that's the key thing for this pile--do not chase. this person is worrying about whether you're the right one, and it's important for you not to change who you are fundamentally for this person. it's a lesson in disguise. the only thing i'd be wary of is competition--this can be a double-edged sword. for a lot of you, water and mountains are significant. also something about dragons. this person values authenticity, and i would highly suggest that you be yourself around them. they fall for people who are unashamed to be themselves :) you're already on the right path. just make sure you're not idealizing this person.

song: oblivion -- grimes.

signs: june. seaglass. lucky clover. spirals. accessorizing. let yourself feel. baby steps. pink.

------------------

pile 2--5 of cups, 4 of cups, death.

ooouu your crush is going through it right now. they're very much focused on some negative aspect of their life currently. they may be a drama queen, and they're definitely suspicious and cautious as a person. they might be one of those people who are afraid to be truly happy. what i'm hearing is that you have to evaluate what you see in this person--do you think they're pretty, do you think they're smart? what qualities of theirs do you like? you really have to think about how much you know of them in order to go onto the next step. you are abundance personified. if you are lowering yourself to the ground just to be on this person's eye level, you are doing the wrong thing. change is coming to sweep you away, and this crush will reform the way you not only see them (which can be good or bad) but how you see YOURSELF. they may mirror the qualities of yourself that you're afraid of seeing. something new is coming. they may not necessarily be ready for a relationship right now. does this immediately write you out? no. am i telling you to give up? no. but i think you have to let this person be, for a little bit. they need time to figure out what they want and if they can't appreciate you fully, you deserve better. they need a little bit of time to grow, and you can wait--but don't spend the rest of your life waiting, alright? you're gorgeous, you're smart, you're clever, you are ethereal. you can get anyone you want, so be careful what you wish for.

song: dark beach -- pastel ghost.

signs: hands. physical body. swelling tides. purple. cougar. losing hope. clay. sculpture. club.

------------------

pile 3--temperance, 5 of cups, 8 of cups.

this person is probably seen by you as angelic. otherworldly, even. they're an absolute sweetheart and considerate towards everyone, a very well rounded person and balanced in many ways that make you swoon. you probably think they're ahead of you in life--either older, or simply an old soul. they were raised right by their parents and it SHOWS. you're probably wondering what to do...i feel like for most of you, you haven't talked to this person. right now, they're not really looking to romance. they're not focused on it. but you must tap their shoulder, initiate a connection without expecting something romantic from it. a lot of you have this tunnel vision and don't see that connections can be valuable even if they're platonic. it's worth reaching out with an open heart and an open mind. many of you have been taught that you are only valuable because of your body or your beauty, and that's simply not true. you're amazing simply because you're you, and you don't have to be insecure about anything. this person is smart--they'll connect with you immediately. am i promising that they're gonna love you and like you and you'll suddenly start dating? no. am i saying that you should see this situation as ending bad? no. you have to let yourself let go of the past in order to move forwards. think about whether you miss a past lover, or a past crush. do you? if you do, reflect on that and make sure you've fully let go of them before racing towards love again.

song: her -- the american dawn.

signs: calendar. rains, storms. dogs. nails. birds. bugs. animals in general. worship. reaching out, up.

------------------

pile 4--the hierophant, 8 of cups.

before i even started reading for this pile, i started feeling a sense of home, and i wanted to cry. that may be significant for someone. your crush is probably a deep person who's not exactly easy to access. they're selective with the people they let into their life--good news is, you and this person mesh well. there's a scattered amount of you--some have spoken with this person, some haven't, some will. this person really does want to move forwards and have a better life. they're on a journey, and on this journey, they've met you. you're a very smart person, pile 4. very fox-like, very clever and beautiful in a very raw, natural way. they may think you're extremely unique, like, super special in a way. i think they might develop a small crush on you, too, which will grow BUT only if you're able to be vulnerable and have open conversations without shutting them out. they value a general sense of honesty, and you guys would be able to grow your relationship as long as the both of you cultivate a sense of honesty. you're like shy teenagers, puppy love. they may be religious. you may have met them in college/school/religious place. this is going to end well for you, pile 4. you've worked hard and you deserve every bit of this.

song: all i need -- radiohead.

signs: cities. butterflies. mango juice. skin. dolphins. summer. bleeding. curtains. parentification. breath of fresh air. hoop earrings.

------------------

pile 5--the lovers, justice, 8 of swords.

your crush is a very romantic person. they're honestly very happy-go-lucky, and they see the world through rose-colored glasses. they're open, bright--honestly, meant for the spotlight. probably a fire sign. they thrive in social circles, and compared to them, you're on the quieter side. you're a very introspective person. you probably think this person could never ever like you back...you're the type of person who'd be like they're out of my league! baby, no one is out of your league. you're better than you think. you must work on your insecurities before you are able to have this person. good thing is that the universe is more than willing to give you the goodness that you deserve. you're inherently a very special person, pile 5. you see people and you create a feeling of absolute comfort and peace within others, but you are unable to carve that out for yourself. this sounds corny and i know you're tired of hearing it, but you must first love yourself before loving others. this person will be waiting on the other side for you, but only when you learn how to take care of yourself.

song: juna -- clairo.

signs: pacific northwest. girlhood. fungi/bacteria. faces. one with the earth. childhood memories.

------------------

pile 6--the magician, page of wands, 5 of cups, 3 of cups.

you guys are BLINDDD BLINDDDDDDDDD. okay? stop looking at the bad signs and start looking at the good signs. okay...first of all, your crush is probably like, seen by you as this great person. you're not idealizing them--you are simply grown enough to accept their flaws. they're probably clever, academically bright, and a good person. for most, a man. he's respectful, and good news is--he likes you! he sees you as a smart, growing person, with good feminine energy. you're extremely caring and bubbly and sweet and it just makes this person want to hold you, sweep you up. but do you see that? hell nah! you refuse to believe anything right now because it's not happening in front of you. it will, but this is a new beginning on the horizon, and you have to realize that things ultimately take time. things take risks. stop looking at all the bad things, and look at the good things. you're a very successful person, in general, and you should look at those achievements first. you're in the spotlight--focus on the other beautiful qualities of your life for now. enjoy the journey. you're loved. you're beautiful.

song: lover, you should've come over -- jeff buckley.

signs: bed. america. jazz. tea. grow old, grow grey. cats. shadow work. looking within. self-discovery. the time will be right.

------------------

[rockwgooglyeyes]

Finding Paradise of Someone Else's Flesh - Paratise Analysis

Unlike Nowhere, which was a song detailing Ivan's resignation in the face of life, his apathy and how his dreams have been trampled upon by reality, Paratise is a love song. Admittedly, Black Sorrow is a love song as well, but the love therein has already been tainted by Ivan's trauma. Black Sorrow is more about loving someone in spite of the fact that they will never love you back, the pain of looking at someone and knowing they'll never turn back for you, never meet your eyes. Paratise is a bit different, because the love is new, fresh, revolutionary. Ivan has never felt something like this before and so it changes his entire worldview.

Ivan's love for Till is dirty, visceral, desperate- and I would argue that's because of the fact that he's never felt anything like this love before (there was no warmth to be found, well that would have been okay, and then my eyes saw you struggling). I made this comparison when I was talking to a friend (@4listr) but the intensity of Ivan's love reminds me of when you're a baby and every new emotion is the biggest emotion you've ever had and anything can make you cry because you can't regulate your emotions, you have no foundation or context.

Ivan's never wanted anything before, not in the same way he wants Till, (In the empty space about "what's your wish?" I wrote something for the first time) so of course he's ravenous. If you'd been starved for so long you forgot what hunger even felt like and you suddenly got a taste of food, wouldn't you realize how unbearably hungry you were? Ivan has never been loved before, never been in love before, and he's desperate for whatever little scraps of affection he can get (I want you more, to dig into your wounds, so perfect).

So many of the metaphors in Paratise are about how, whether or not Ivan truly believes he can be the center of Till's universe, whether or not he believes Till could ever love him in return, he wants to be the shadow that clings to Till's heels (What's even closer than light is always shadow), he wants to still be close to Till, even if it's painful (Carve it into my painful existence, the relationship between you and I, I like it). He literally says that he wants to be the rest between the notes of Till's song, which basically means he wants to worm his way into Till's life in whatever way that Till will have him, because the same thing is said in Black Sorrow "Where your eyes reach, where your fingertips brush, waiting for you endlessly." Ivan isn't doing this because he expects to get anything out of it, he's doing this because he has to be close to Till, Till makes him feel like he's alive. That's why he died for Till because without him, he would be dead anyways.

Tying into that, the title Paratise, is a combination of "paradise" and "parasite" which is frankly genius because of the added meaning there. Till is salvation for Ivan, he makes Ivan feel like this might be worth it, gives Ivan a reason to live, but at the very same time? Ivan would be unable to live without Till. The reason this is so important is because of the choice to use the word "parasite", as parasitism is a kind of symbiosis where one organism is harmed and the other (the parasite) benefits. Additionally, many parasites cannot sustain themselves without a host, meaning that while it is negative for the host, it is necessary for the parasite to survive, which is definitely what Ivan is playing at. Especially with lines like "My wish, to live in you like a parasite" and "I want you more, to dig into your wounds" Ivan is focusing on and amplifying how intense his love is, and how ugly it would be were it ever realized.

It's impossible for me to think that Ivan says "My secret... Bury it, deep within my heart, by the time you figure it out, it's already Unknown till the end..." for any other reason than that he thinks that his love is too ugly and horrible and that even if Till didn't reject him (and that's a big IF in Ivan's head because god forbid he ever be happy), his love would hurt Till. As much as Ivan thinks himself to be a monster, he doesn't want to hurt Till, and in a way, that's why he never told Till about his feelings, because he believed that his feelings would only serve as a burden, a curse for Till to bear for the rest of his life. After all, "you are always for me."

tagging my friends who helped me figure out this argument and listened to me babble about this!! @ivanttakethis & @verdantlights. also tagging @bluemoonscape, @geospiral, @alien-til-i-stage & @crustyfloor feel free to yell at me if you do not want to be tagged

source of translation

Side Note that doesn't really fit in with my main argument: Frankly, on a biological level, I would argue that Ivantill (as a relationship in general) isn't an example of parasitism, simply because Ivan doesn't solely benefit, nor is Till solely harmed. They kind of have a back and forth of hurting and helping each other in turn, whether that's on purpose or on accident- I would say it's probably closer to mutualism- but I think it's safe to say that Ivan views it as parasitism simply because he hates himself something awful, he views even his kindness to Till as inherently selfish, and also he thinks Till hates him.

[starmaidengarden]

@meime13 request: OMG, I just read what i requested, it was super cute, tbh, I didn't expected u to reply to my request, thank u very much, i think at this rate i'll become a bit greedy and always sending requests, ofc, if u don't mind, thank u very much Can I request smth else? Of course if u don't mind, may I request headcanons second year students (+Ace, if it's too much u can ignore it) with an s/o who's really sensitive, like can get provoked really easily and can cry from anger as well, and takes things personally sometimes without realizing it and sometimes unconsciously victimize herself and really subjective altho she claims to be "logical", and she absolutely hate this side of her and wish she was stone hearted person or emotionless and use her brain instead of her heart Sorry for too much yapping, it's ok if u don't accept the request, tbh i think i got a lil too excited, Take care

— 2nd years : ace : x gn!reader. victimize, ace being ace. established relationship. dividers : uzmacchiato!

a/n: no worries! I love your headcanons! Feel free to send as many requests as you like. There was a problem with the request where I couldn't add pictures. Sorry to do it this way again. hope you enjoy!!

Riddle Rosehearts ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ At first, Riddle might have a tough time with how you react—he used to keep his feelings bottled up, thinking they were a weakness. But when he sees you cry or take things seriously, it hits him hard.

⭑.ᐟ He really tries to tread carefully around you and feels bad if he comes off too harsh. “Being pushed by your emotions isn’t a bad thing. It just needs a little guidance instead of pushing it away.” He’ll help you find ways to handle your feelings better—like journaling, or even venting sessions.

Ace Trappola ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ At first, he might be kind of clueless and joke around too much, unintentionally setting you off. When he realizes his teasing has hurt you, his behavior changes completely. “Wait, I didn’t mean it like that! Damn, I’m really sorry—I was just messing around.” He’d feel really bad seeing you cry out of frustration or anger, especially if it was triggered by something he said.

⭑.ᐟ He doesn’t like seeing you hate yourself over your feelings and often tries to reassure you. “If you were just some emotionless robot, I probably wouldn’t even like you,” he says with a half-smile, hoping to lighten the mood. When you're overwhelmed, he tries to help you work through your feelings logically, but he’s learned to listen more and push less. He understands that being present for you, especially in tough moments, is what truly matters.

Ruggie Bucchi ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Ruggie is really good at brushing things off, so he’s surprised by how seriously you take everything. He often jokes about stuff that upsets you, not because he intends any harm, but because that’s just how he deals with things—and it usually backfires. When he sees you getting upset or spiraling into negative thoughts about yourself, he shifts into serious mode.

⭑.ᐟ He quietly brings you some food, sits next to you, and lets you vent until you calm down. Then, he teases you just enough to help you get out of your head. He reminds you that feeling emotions is part of getting through life; not everything has to be so logical all the time. “Even if you feel too much sometimes, I’d rather that than you not care at all.”

Azul Ashengrotto ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Azul truly understands your deep-seated feelings, even if he presents a tough surface. He knows what it’s like to struggle with parts of yourself that you can’t change, particularly the lingering fear of being perceived as “weak.” Initially, he is taken aback by your emotional outbursts and tries to resolve everything with logic, which only deepens your distress.

⭑.ᐟ However, once he realizes this approach isn’t effective, he shifts. He begins offering you more compliments and the emotional support you’ve been missing. Also, he enjoys helping you work through your thoughts, gently guiding you past any negative thinking. “Even if you can’t see it right now, I promise—what I see is someone worth listening to.”

Jade Leech ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Jade is really in tune with your feelings—he picks up on your emotional shifts even before you do. He never makes you feel dumb or irrational for crying or reacting strongly. His voice has this calm, soothing vibe, kind of like a lullaby. When you’re stuck in a loop of self-hate, he helps you flip your thoughts around. “Your feelings are part of what makes you, you. Why get rid of something so human?”

⭑.ᐟ He’s the kind of person who helps you figure out your reactions without judging. He’s never condescending but does push back a bit “Do you really want to be emotionless, or do you just want to avoid getting hurt so easily?”

Floyd Leech ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Floyd really loves your passionate side because it’s all over the place and real. He never judges you for it, even if he doesn’t always get it. If you’re crying out of anger, he gets fired up too— “Who messed with you? Want me to take care of them?” He’s not the type to baby you, but he knows how to comfort you in his own way—with tight hugs and holding your face, telling you, “I like Shrimpy just like this. Don’t change and become boring.”

⭑.ᐟ He can be pretty blunt and might say stuff that ends up hurting your feelings without meaning to. Then he gets a bit mopey if you take it too hard, like, “I didn’t mean it that way, don’t be like that…” Floyd appreciates your honesty, even if it leads to tears because you’re never boring, and that’s what he loves the most.

Kalim Al-Asim ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ He doesn’t judge you for crying or getting upset—often. However, since he is such a cheerful person, he sometimes fails to notice when you're really struggling internally or blaming yourself.

⭑.ᐟ When he does pick up on it, he responds by showing even more affection: giving you hugs, showering you with compliments, and listing all the reasons he loves how expressive you are. He’s not interested in changing you; he simply reminds you that it’s completely okay to be emotional—it just shows how much you care. “Honestly, if you weren’t like this, I probably wouldn’t have fallen for you. You make everything feel so real.”

Jamil Viper ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Jamil picks up on everything, even the little stuff, like small expressions and changes in your mood. He may not always say anything, but he knows exactly how easily you can get hurt. When you get upset and cry from anger, he helps you take deep breaths while giving you some space. Later on, he’ll sit next to you and ask if you want to talk or let it all out.

⭑.ᐟ He also tries to share some of his grounding tricks with you, like breathing techniques or mental checklists, to help you work through your feelings. “You don’t have to be emotionless to be strong. Honestly, it just means your heart is more open than mine ever was.”

Silver ༉⋆｡˚

⭑.ᐟ Silver is incredibly patient with you, your sensitivity doesn’t bother him. When you feel overwhelmed, he speaks to you softly and doesn’t push you to "make sense" of things—he simply waits until you feel safe.

⭑.ᐟ He encourages you to take it easy, find your footing, and slow down. “You don’t have to figure everything out. Sometimes you just need to feel it.” If you express a desire to be emotionless, he frowns, “That would be a shame. Your feelings are what make you, you.”

[callme-holly]

could you do some hcs about the gang x a reader who's really self conscious and constantly needs reassurance? i love u and your writing sm btw <3

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

a/n: thank you so much that means a lot <33. I actually love this sm i cant even

Darry Curtis:

Darry always senses when you’re feeling slightly down and hates the fact that you second-guess yourself in any way, shape or form. He becomes almost protective when he hears you talking negatively about yourself.

If you’re looking in the mirror, he’ll come up and stand with you, getting you to point out what you’re nervous about so he can shower you with compliments and show you exactly why you’re so perfect. 

“You don’t need to be anyone but yourself. That’s more than good enough.” 

When it comes to reassurance, he’s all about soft touches: forehead kisses, tight hugs, etc…

Sodapop Curtis: 

Soda drops everything to cheer you up and is there in a heartbeat if he even hears you so much as breathe a word of negativity about yourself. He rushes over, cupping your face in his hands and shushing you with a kiss.

He honestly doesn’t understand what there is to be insecure about; you’re perfect, but he never judges you. He just showers you with all the reassurance you need. 

He’ll pepper you with kisses, hands tracing patterns into your skin, complimenting you like it’s the last thing he can do. 

Ponyboy Curtis: 

Pony understands insecurity in some way—he often experiences it himself— and tries everything he can to make sure you don’t feel like that. He asks what’s wrong, sitting with you and letting you rant for as long as you need.

Once you’re done, he’ll smile and then repeat everything you just said but with the reason why those things are so perfect. He doesn’t give you the chance to cut in, doesn’t allow any “buts” because all of his reasons are totally valid. 

Johnny Cade: 

Johnny is so gentle when it comes to reassuring you and he always picks up on your mood change when you startntonfeel insecure. He’ll come over, arms wrapping around you as he whispers comforting words into your hair. 

He’s so incredibly patient, letting you get everything out of your system before he chooses what to say. He makes it known just how much he loves you and how perfect you are to him. 

Dallas Wintson: 

Dally doesn’t always handle deep emotions well, and when it comes down to insecurity, he doesn’t approach it well. Sure, he experiences it himself, but in a very different way to you, and his ways of coping are not at all what you need. 

If he catches you putting yourself down, he gets frustrated and will firmly tell you that you’re talking bullshit. He doesn’t mean to be harsh, but he truly runs off of harsh, blunt love. 

If you need him to hold yo, he’ll tug you into his lap, kissing you deep. He’s so incredibly honest, giving you compliments in the most him way possible. 

“The hell you talkin’ about? You got the best ass in this whole town, baby.”

Steve Randle: 

Steve also isn’t the best when it comes to handling deeper things, but he tries his best to be there. He might make a joke at first, hoping to ease the tension slightly, but when he sees you just need to be held, he’ll comply.

He’ll compliment you more often, making sure he points out all the things he likes every single day, emphasising it until you crack a smile. 

When you’re feeling self conscious, he’ll give you small kisses, rubbing your back until it passes and you truly see how perfect you are. 

 Two–Bit Mathews: 

Two tries to cheer you up by making jokes, maybe putting others down to make you feel better, but he can also get to the parts that cut so much deeper. He’s incredibly sweet when you need him to be and won’t stand around letting you feel bad about yourself. 

He’ll feed you little compliments and some teasing but 100% genuine, laced with a sweetness only he can manage and still look tuff. 

When he needs to be, he’s very serious, telling you how perfect you are in a firm enough way to get his point across. 

tag list. @mrsdillonx , @goingdelux18 , @princesshailierawr let me know if you want to me added <3

[wisecura]

Sheets

megumi fushiguro x fem-reader

p.1

p.10  ( ⸝⸝꩜ ᯅ ꩜⸝⸝;) p.12 (getting close to the end)

p.11

AN: very very very sorry for the late post! I do have a clear ending in mind for this (typed up my outlines and everything) and I'm hoping to wrap it up soon--thank you for your love and support! and my cute anons asking for updates. it really had been encouraging even when i'm not feeling great. I hope this chapter is up to par, been feeing a bit of a block and a bit shy with posting. sometimes I focus on the negative and forget i'm doing this as a hobby. (get a bit self conscious and wonder if i'm even good at writing haha) so thank you again for the love and support. If this sounds disorganized please tolerate me ♥️ i'm ranting now, so please--

warnings: this story may cover sensitive and uncomfortable topics. please read at your own risk, violence, lashings, blood, mental breakdowns, yandere, obsessive behavior, possessiveness, mommy kinks, mommy issues, arranged marriages, forced marriages, angst, eventual smut, clan politics, age gap (5 years from meg, and a little over 10 with toji), toji aint the best dad, mentions of child abuse, slowww build.

Short summary: Your arranged marriage to Toji Fushiguro had been sudden and unexpected, but now you found yourself living under his roof alongside your moody stepson. Your only directive from your clan head before moving in was clear: keep a close eye on Toji, the notorious Sorcerer Killer, and his son, a potential sorcerer prodigy.

anons, anons, anons (if i say it three times will you appear?♥️)

Your eyes locked onto it immediately.

He’d forgotten his school bag at home, which was so uncharacteristic for the always-on-top-of-it Megumi. The fact that he's gone off without it was a surprise in and of itself.

And being the good, responsible figure you were, you decided you needed to get it back to him. Sure, you could’ve just texted him, but the nagging curiosity ate away in the back of your mind.

You deserved that much…right? 

Over the past few years, both you and Megumi had grown, though in ways that felt fundamentally different. It seemed like only yesterday when you towered over him by at least a foot, but now, at 22, standing on the edge of what felt like both everything and nothing, you began to pick up on more around you. Each time he came back, it was as though he had learned something new, gained some insight or skill that added to the ever-growing distance between the person he was and the person he was becoming.

And with those changes came those unwelcome feelings that gnawed at the back of your mind. Jealousy���Admiration. A sense of responsibility that weighed heavier than it had any right to. Overwhelming affection that felt almost instinctive, but no less unsettling. A little too...much for deep thought. And astonishment at the person who regularly sat in front of you at the dinner table—so far removed from the boy you once knew. 

Meanwhile, your life felt stuck in place, confined to the monotony of daily errands and long hours indoors. Days blurred together, weeks slipped by unnoticed, and yet that nagging ache in the back of your mind never left. So desperate to go off the beaten path. 

And the trail leading to Jujutsu High was gorgeous. Thick trees lined the path, their leafy branches casting intricate shadows on the pavement. The sunlight peeked through in golden streaks, making the entire scene feel almost surreal. The warmth on your face nearly euphoric. You’d only ever seen pictures of this place when you looked it up online, but they didn’t do it justice. 

“Woah. And who might you be?” 

The sudden voice shattered your focus, making you spin around so fast you nearly lost your footing. Your pulse spiked, heart pounding in your chest as you stumbled back a step, clutching the two bags in your hands like a damn lifeline. For a brief moment, the world around you blurred, leaving only a splotch of leaves in your line of sight.

Your gaze snapped to a face far too close for comfort—definitely too close.

White, unruly hair, gleamed in the sunlight, but it was his eyes, so unnervingly blue, that froze you in place. He was undeniably handsome. But the smirk that graced his face and the look in his eye as his head tilted slightly, was unnerving. As if you were some curious puzzle he’d stumbled upon.

“Lost?” he asked, his tone light and teasing, but there was an undeniable weight in his presence that sent a shiver down your spine. Then it hit you—the suffocating wave of cursed energy radiating off him. It was staggering, an oppressive force pressing down on your chest and making it hard to breathe. How had you not felt it before? It rolled off him in unrelenting waves, so overwhelming it left you momentarily speechless, rooted to the spot.

“What? You shy?”

His voice broke the silence, dripping with that insufferable amusement. He was just as bad as Toji it seemed. He tilted his head a bit more, his eyes glinting mischievously, as if your reaction was the highlight of his day. Your irritation felt obvious, but it was quickly drowned out by the lingering unease that his cursed energy evoked. Stranger danger. stranger danger.

You instinctively stepped back, trying to create some distance, but he didn’t budge. If anything, he leaned in closer, his presence invading your space with an air of lazy confidence, like he had all the time in the world to unravel whatever it was he found so intriguing about you.

You hadn’t even realized you were staring until he spoke again, the lilt in his tone making your cheeks heat with something closer to indignation. Still, you weren’t about to be rude—not with someone who exudes this kind of power. Not when he was the only one walking down this path with you. Not another soul in sight.

“Sorry,” your voice wavering slightly. “Do you… work here?” The hesitation in your tone was unmistakable, and his response was immediate—a wide grin stretching across his face. Fitting.

“That depends… who’s asking?” 

Before you could respond, your name rang out, a deep voice, heavy and familiar, cutting through the air from behind you. The grin faltered on the man’s face for the briefest of moments, replaced by a flicker of surprise as his eyes shifted past you to the source. You turned instinctively, already recognizing who it belonged to, even before you saw him.

Of course, it was Megumi.

“What’re you doing here?” His voice was blunt, almost tense, as he closed the distance between you in a few long, purposeful strides. There was no warmth, no casual greeting—just that demanding tone that made your chest tighten.

Why did he look so upset?

Oh, did you... mess up?

You barely had a chance to open your mouth before he was standing right in front of you, his hands gripping your shoulders firmly. His eyes scanned over you as if he was checking for some kind of damage you hadn’t even realized might be there.

“You... left your bag at home,” you voice was soft, quiet. He didn't seem to acknowledge your words as you attempt to hold up the bag. Proof of your...innocence? Why would you even need a reason to be here? You weren't doing anything wrong.

His expression never wavered, the clench of his jaw making it clear that your answer hadn’t fully soothed whatever was bothering him. His grip on your shoulders softened slightly, though he gave them a small squeeze, almost reassuring. But his attention shifted.

Gaze moving past you, and you felt the change immediately. His posture stiffened, his whole demeanor shifting into something colder, more guarded. Without a word, he stepped in front of you, his body casually yet deliberately placing itself between you and the white-haired man. His shoulders completely blocking you from view. The movement was subtle, but the message was clear. Just how did Megumi know a man like this?

“Gojo-sensei,” —Ah.

“What’re you doing here? I thought you were on a mission.”

The man—Gojo—let out a heavily dramatic sigh, looking completely unbothered by Megumi’s tone. “Finished early,” he replied with a casual shrug, hands crossing behind his head, far too relaxed. “But who’s this you’re hiding?”

His voice gave you chills, and you shifted uncomfortably, not able to see him, but no doubt that creepy grin was still slapped across his face. Gojo didn’t wait for an answer. He leaned slightly, trying to catch a better look at you around Megumi’s frame. “She’s not your girlfriend, is she?”

“No,” Megumi shot back, the word flat and final, his tone leaving no room for interpretation. Gojo raised his hands in mock surrender.

“Alright, alright. Touchy, huh?” His voice was playful, almost sing-song, but the way his gaze lingered on you felt a little too probing, a little too long for comfort had Megumi clenching his fists.

You swallowed hard, heat rising to your cheeks. Whether it was from embarrassment, unease, or the palpable tension between him and Megumi, you couldn’t quite tell. You hadn’t interacted with Gojo much, but the way Megumi’s entire presence had shifted told you everything you needed to know—Gojo wasn’t exactly a welcome sight. Whatever lightness existed in the air before was gone, replaced by an invisible but tangible weight pressing between the three of you.

Gojo might not have been dangerous, but he definitely gave the impression of someone who liked to push boundaries just to see how far he could go. His teasing nature seemed to thrive on reactions, and you could tell Megumi wasn’t in the mood to indulge him.

A stray thought crept into your mind....maybe Megumi had never mentioned you to anyone here... The idea hit harder than you expected, a dull ache settling in your chest. You banished it before it could take root—now wasn’t the time.

“Yo! There you guys are!”

A bright and cheery voice shattered the lingering tension. You turned to see a pink-haired boy jogging toward the group, a huge grin plastered across his face. His eyes were wide and warm, his energy unmistakable—this had to be the friend from the photo Megumi sent. There was something undeniably magnetic about him, a friendliness so genuine it seemed to pour off him in waves, reminding you immediately of an overexcited puppy.

Megumi stiffened beside you, muttering something under his breath you couldn’t quite catch before reluctantly offering a grumbled greeting. Yuji skidded to a stop just in front of you, planting his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. He straightened quickly, his grin softening into something almost shy when his eyes landed on you.

“Oh, hi!” he said, a light blush creeping onto his cheeks. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, his smile still firmly in place. “Sorry—I’m Yuji Itadori! You must be… uh…” His voice trailed off as his brow furrowed, the wheels in his head clearly turning as he tried to piece together who you might be.

Megumi let out a long sigh, his irritation practically radiating off him. “She’s with me,” he said flatly, stepping just slightly closer to you, his tone making it clear he wasn’t in the mood for explanations.

You couldn’t help but smile at him, his presence a much needed distraction. “Nice to meet you, Yuji,” you said warmly. Yuji’s face lit up even more at your friendly response. “Wow, Fushiguro never said anything about—”THWACK!

Before he could finish, Megumi stepped forward and smacked Yuji on the back of the head with a loud thunk that echoed down the trail, making you jump.

“Megumi!” surprise flooding your tone, trying to sound somewhat scolding. This had to be a first. You'd never seen Megumi so...

Yuji barely flinched, rubbing the back of his head for a second before laughing. “Jeez, Fushiguro! What’s with you today?” His grin stayed intact, though you couldn’t miss the slight wince that suggested the hit hadn’t exactly been gentle.

He raised his hands in mock surrender, still chuckling. “It’s fine! I’ve got an extra-thick skull anyway,” he added with a playful wink in your direction. You noticed Megumi seemed even more frustrated with the additional member, but he didn't comment on it. You wondered how long he'd hold out until he just left.

“Well, Megumi,” Gojo emphasized the name with a teasing lilt, his eyes flicking to you as if testing the waters. “This is…interesting. Didn’t mention you’d have company today.”

Megumi’s scowl deepened, his eyes narrowing slightly. “It’s none of your business,” he shot back without hesitation. He hadn't even known you were coming. A mistake on your part obviously.

“Whoa, Fushiguro, didn’t know you were the overprotective type,” Yuji joked, though his curiosity was evident beneath the teasing tone.

Gojo leaned slightly. "She a friend or something?"

This all but confirmed your earlier suspicions. Megumi doesn't talk about you. You drew in a breath. “I’m his—” 

Megumi’s hand shot out, his grip firm but not harsh as it wrapped around your wrist. “We’re done here,” he muttered, his tone low and decisive. Without sparing a glance back, he began steering you away with purposeful steps, leaving no room for protest.

“Wait—what?” Yuji’s voice followed after you, completely baffled. But neither tried to stop him. Gojo chuckled quietly and gave a lazy wave. “See you around… whoever you are,” he called out, lighthearted, his eyes trailing you.

Why the hell was he so curious about you.

Megumi kept his grip on your wrist, practically dragging you along until the two of you reached a more private spot—a quiet little area tucked beneath an overgrowth of trees. Thick bushes surrounded the bench, adding a sense of seclusion that felt both calming and suffocating all at once. You recognized the place from earlier on your walk. It wasn’t far from the front entrance, and the realization sent a small pang through your chest. How many times would he make it obvious he didn't want you here until you'd get it? The self conscious part of you brain was screaming at you. feeling oddly shy with being here.

You stole a glance at him, catching sight of his face. His jaw, clenched, his gaze sharp and tunneled, like he was too lost in his own frustration to notice anything else. The tension in his features was unmistakable, and that tightness in your gut only grew.

When he finally let go of your wrist, you felt the cool air replace the warmth of his touch, though it didn’t ease the knot forming in your stomach. He sighed, his shoulders sinking slightly as some of the tension eased from his posture.

“What’re you doing here?” his voice, low but softer than before.

You could easily cry. Despite being the older one here, you felt more like a scolded toddler, small and out of place. But when your eyes met his, something shifted. The hard glare he’d been wearing was gone, replaced by a calmer expression, maybe even a little tired. His hands moved to his face, rubbing across his eyes as if trying to wipe away the remnants of his frustration.

You really needed to get ahold of yourself. Since when did it matter if he wanted you there? You were there to drop off something he forgot. Maybe it was just the embarrassment teens get when their overly affectionate parent comes to dote on them in front of their friends. Maybe theyd tease him about this later....

When he looked at you again, there was that particular softness in his gaze, the kind that made your chest ache. Your thoughts immediately cleared. Maybe he wasn't so upset with you...

“You embarrassed of me?” you joked weakly, forcing out a laugh that didn’t quite land. You prayed the faint hurt in your tone wasn’t as obvious as it felt.

Megumi’s eyes widened, caught off guard. Like he hadn't anticipated you actually being hurt by his actions. He could sense the tension in your voice, much like how you could sense his. He stared at you for what felt like forever, his mouth opening slightly as though he wanted to respond, only to close again as the words faltered. His head tilted just a fraction, his brows furrowing in thought, like he was scrambling for an excuse but coming up empty. The silence stretched between you, and for a moment, it seemed like he wasn’t sure what to say—or if he even could.

You chuckled, stepping forward to pinch his cheek lightly. “Relax,” you teased, quickly shoving down the lingering sting of your own feelings as you swung the strap off your shoulder and held the bag out to him. He wasn't mad at you. “I told you—I brought your bag. How can someone as responsible as you forget something like this, hmm?”

For a moment, Megumi just stared at the bag, like he couldn’t quite believe you’d gone out of your way for something so trivial. Slowly, he reached out to take it, his fingers brushing yours in the process. The brief contact wasn’t much, but you caught the faintest flush creeping into his cheeks.

“Thanks… mom,” he muttered, his voice quieter than usual, almost shy.

He eyed the second bag slung around your shoulder.

"Oh! And this is for you." He took the bag quizzically, peeking inside only for his eyes to light up. "Thought I'd at least bring your favorite." The packed dinner was a good choice. The awkward tension from earlier melted away as a warm smile spread across his face.

You couldn’t help but laugh softly at how cute he was, the tense atmosphere already fading away. A small lull settled between you, the kind of silence that felt comfortable rather than strained. The overgrown trees swayed gently overhead, their leaves whispered softly in the breeze, wrapping the moment in an almost serene stillness. It was starting to get cold out. Soon enough, he would be due for another birthday. Yours had already passed a few weeks back.

Without warning, Megumi stepped forward, pulling you into a tight hug. His arms wrapped securely around you, holding you close as his chin came to rest lightly on top of your head. The embrace was firm, not overbearing, and for a moment, you froze in surprise before leaning into it. He was always one for affectionate gestures... but....

“You should head back,” he said quietly, though there was a faint reluctance in his tone that made you nearly hesitate. You didnt want to leave just yet.

You nodded, your hands brushing his arms briefly before you pulled back. “Alright,” you replied softly, offering him another small smile before turning to leave.

As you walked back toward the path, you spotted Gojo and Yuji nearby, standing a little too still to pass as innocent. You were sure they were supposed to have left already, but there they were—watching. Not that you had anything you were particularly secretive about.

But Yuji’s gaze seemed to dart to anywhere but you, his hands shoved deep into his pockets, while Gojo leaned casually against a tree, the ever-present grin on his face somehow managing to look even more smug.

The second your eyes met theirs, Yuji’s face flushed bright red. He muttered something under his breath, quickly averting his gaze as though he could disappear by sheer will. Gojo, on the other hand, stood there shamelessly. All cocky and arrogant. Immediately irritating you again.

Megumi stepped out from behind you, their eyes shifting over immediately. Gojo’s grin turned absolutely wicked, his quirked brow seeming ready to tease him endlessly. Yuji’s mouth twitched, as though he was trying—and failing—not to laugh, his wide eyes flicking between the two of you. 

Megumi, however, barely acknowledged them. He strode past you without a word, but as he did, you felt the faintest brush of his hand against your back. The touch was light, almost imperceptible, but deliberate enough to send a jolt through you. Your cheeks warmed instantly, and before you could even process the moment, Gojo gave an exaggerated cough. 

By the time Megumi reached their sides, Gojo and Yuji were all over him, poking his cheeks and teasing him relentlessly. You couldn’t help but wonder if they’d ever let him live down whatever they thought they’d seen. For someone as stoic as Megumi, seeing him soften must’ve been quite the sight for them.

You sighed quietly, feeling a little secondhand embarrassment for him.

The walk home was pretty silent.

It was hard to find much to do when the house was as silent as it was. Time seemed to crawl as you went through the motions of your routine, everything blurring together in the same, boring monotony.

You and Megumi exchanged texts here and there, but as always, he was evasive about certain topics. He avoided talking about his friends, that teacher, and especially his missions. No matter how many ways you tried to bring it up, he always managed to steer the conversation elsewhere.

But he seemed more comfortable sharing through photos—pictures of the meals he was eating, scenic views, and even the occasional selfie with a classmate or two. It seemed he was trying to include you more in his day to day life, maybe sensing your growing urge for something different. You couldn’t help but feel a little guilty about it.

He wasn’t supposed to be worrying about you like this—but when had Megumi ever not been thoughtful when it came to you?

He was always helping around the house, bringing home things you needed. He’d carry the heavier bags without being asked, and when he was home, he never went out much. Instead, he’d linger in your presence, watching the same TV shows you liked, or even sitting in complete silence, or even sun napping on the couch. A second shadow.

And if you were forced to admit it, he made the loneliness and monotony a lot easier to bear. His presence had a way of filling the empty spaces, making the house feel less like a silent box and more like a home.

When it came to you, Megumi seemed to have a sixth sense. He was always away at school when you were called out to your clan house, yet, without fail, he’d send you a message the second you got back, asking how you were. He always seemed to know when you were stressed or needed something—sometimes even before you realized it yourself. Megumi wasn’t just thoughtful. No, he was in tune with you in a way that felt almost uncanny.

And now that he was older… you couldn’t help but wonder. Did he still harbor that same puppy crush he had when he was younger? The thought made your head spin. Was he still seeing you in that light, or had it faded? He’d never fully confirmed it back then, never said anything outright. But he’d always been affectionate—hadn’t he?

Wasn’t he always like that? 

And yet… how would you feel about that?

No.

These weren’t the right questions to be asking. You still had a place here. You were still his stepmother. These weren’t the thoughts you should even be entertaining, not for a second. But the thought made you freeze in your tracks, the shirt you were folding suddenly feeling heavier in your hands. It was nearing his graduation—just a week away—and you didn't have the faintest idea what came after.

Would he be moving out? Would he stay home for a while to plan his next steps? Would he be doing Jujutsu work? 

And then there was the question you didn’t want to ask, the one that made your stomach twist. Would you still be allowed to stay here? Or would your clan come calling, pulling you out of the life you’d carefully built over the years? The main reason for you being here was Megumi and Toji. Forming those relationships and feeding small bits of information. But if neither of them were even going to be home....

No, surely they wouldn’t. Not after all this time. If they were going to do that, they would’ve already done it… wouldn’t they? Surely....They hadn't mentioned it before at least.

Toji had come home briefly the week before Megumi’s graduation, but it didn’t take long to learn he’d already taken on yet another mission. Despite the two of you growing closer over time, it never seemed to slow him down when it came to picking up those lengthy assignments that kept him away for days at a time.

This time was no different. He mentioned it was a high-profile case, one with the potential to drag on longer than expected. “Two weeks minimum,” and he wouldn’t be back in between.

It wasn’t anything new. Toji’s comings and goings had always been unpredictable, and you’d grown used to the empty spaces he left behind. But something about this mission left you uneasy. 

But for now, all you could do was wait.

come home

[mylonelylife135]

Something Important for 'My Pathetic Family' guys!

*Chapter 2 will be out by the late morning!*

*YOU WILL BE ABLE TO MAKE DECISIONS BASED ON POLLS SOON ONCE YOU ARE OLD ENOUGH TO MAKE IMPACTFUL DECISIONS IN THE STORY!* (This will be by chapter 3!)

*The story will be a darker centered story than most fics, so it will be steered in a certain direction. However, your decisions and what you decide to do or learn will decide whether you succeed in your goals or not!*

*You can either choose to do dumb shit, some heinous ass shit or maybe do something nice for a character if you don't secretly hate them! You'll probably get an option to do something funny occasionally if you're feeling petty with a character.*

*That or you can try to learn new things as you get older. This will be mainly for when you are younger cause kids are curious and so are you!*

*You're going to have to be a bit older to actually try and do heinous ass shit. No offense, but you ain't committing crimes at 6 years old guys💀*

*RELATIONSHIP STATUS* (This will start next chapter!)

An integral part of the story, they will start to be shown every chapter and when a new character is introduced in the family and maybe some other characters if you get to meet them.

PLOT TWIST!

I'm showing how much YOU like The Batfam, what you think of them and if you love them, hate them, if you think they're mean or scary or anything like that. YOUR FEELINGS MATTER TOO IN THIS STORY GUYS! If they didn't this would be a very boring fic 😭

You want to know how the others feel about you? Tooo badddd. (It also might be too many numbers to remember and will get overwhelming to remember, especially if it's changing every chapter. Sorry guys but we both gotta keep our sanity.)

So, numbers! We all love Numbers!

0-15/100: you barely know the person. You probably aren't comfortable around them and you wouldn't be able to pick them out from a crowd.

20-30/100: you're aware of them, you don't think of them as a friend or anything, barely an acquaintance, let alone family.

40-50/100: You know the person, what they like and dislike; you might even like them a little or respect them. They're an acquaintance at best.

50-55/100: They're almost a friend, you both know each other, maybe you both have something you enjoy in common and talk often. There's a good chance you'll hang out now that you know eachother better if given the chance.

55-60/100: Congrats, you're friends! A normal, healthy relationship!

60-80/100: Getting closer, I see? You're starting to care about this character a lot and like being around them. You might even share your vulnerabilities with them if you ever open up.

80-90/100: You love them very deeply and would be saddened if they died or got hurt, you might also cling to them and only really be around this person instead of others you don't know as well.

100/100: I don't think you wanna get here, you might become a bit too obsessed with the person.

If you get to 100%, the story could potentially end. You're the yandere at this point, my guy. You're the problem. A second chance can be given.

*Unless you are still young, you can't do shit to the characters then unless you're like Damian.*

*Spoiler: You ain't built THAT kind of different. Damian is Damian and you are you.*

Now, I know what you're thinking. You're all so funny and attractive, but wait! What if it's the other way around and the numbers go in the negatives?

The answer is: Not good my friends! Not good for you or the character!

It's very important that you have a good relationship with characters.

However, if the characters are mean, insulting, or they even attempt to sabotage or hurt you?

You'll grow to dislike this person. You might even grow to hate them or worse, want to hurt them.

-5/100: You don't really know them but don't like them because of an interaction, wondering why they weren't nice or maybe insulted you. An apology would bring this back to zero.

-10 or -15/100: You're starting to wonder if you did anything wrong, if you weren't mean to them you'll become slightly annoyed and might not want to be in their presence shortly after a bad interaction. This can be fixed if the character apologizes or is a bit nicer.

-20/100: You're starting to become frustrated with this person after repeated bad interactions with them, at this point if the character also has bad interactions with a character you are friends with it will go down further. An apology alone won't fix this.

-30/100: You now start to dread seeing this person or interacting with them, expecting the worst after insults or even more bad interactions. You remember what they've done and you won't forget it either.

-40/100: You start avoiding this person and will now start to hate them. You've learned by now that they won't stop being mean, insulting you or throwing jabs at you.

-50/100: Alright so this is where it's gonna start getting bad. A character can get this low with you if they attack you. (I think you know who would do this. It's literally a trope at this point in every fic I've seen with the neglectful batfam.) You will start to hate them even more and will start insulting them under your breath or start wishing ill on them, their actions towards you will lower even more at a faster rate.

Unless the character has a brain tumor that's making them act irrationally, it's only going to get harder for a character to get out of this percentage without a very good justification or unless they are actively trying to make things right.

-60/100: You start planning on how to get the characters to mess up on missions and start sabotaging them, potentially getting them hurt or in dangerous situations.

-70/100: You are actively sabotaging the characters equipment, missions and information in the hopes of getting them hurt.

It's very easy at this stage to go lower to the -80s immediately, 70s is entirely skippable simply due to how much you hate them.

-80/100: You are actively planning on how to hurt the character or worse. It would take a miracle for you to get out of this state into a less dangerous one. At this point, one more major bad action or a major bad interaction can make you go to 90% instantly.

-90/100: You act out the plan on how to hurt the character and attempt to do so. Whether you succeed on hurting them depends in your skills.

-100/100: You've gotten to the point that you hate this character so much that you snap and take matters into your own hands.

If this happens, the story can potentially end right here as there is no going back from what you did to the character. Or a second chance can be given.

You might also be wondering: can we stop this from happening?

Kind of. You can avoid characters so the meters don't go too high or too low. However, if the meter is in the high negatives at this point it will be up to the character to try and change the relationship for the better because at this point you will most likely not be interested in being kind towards a character you wish ill will on.

TLDR: You can make dumb decisions, heinous ass decisions, funny decisions, learn new stuff. 1 to 100 is good, -1 to -100 is not good. The character or you can be fucked if it goes to 100% or -100% unless you're too young to do anything. You can kind of stop it. Good luck guys. You can also become a yandere cause why not everyone else can why not you?

[potato-lord-but-not]

Around 8 months ago (I can't believe its been that long either) you answered an ask about what Arthur Lester and his 3 bf's ideal positions were (top/bottom/switch), and, just out of curiosity, have you changed your mind at all about your answers? Or is John still a top, Oscar still a bottom, and Noel & Arthur both switches?

ITS BEEN THAT LONG ?!?!!?! good god oufghc anyway anyway- I think that has changed a bit and I’ll put my ramblings under cut bc well. there’s probably a bit more detail than you want out on your tumblr dash

okay Arthur hasn’t changed, he’s still a switch in my heart. I think John is still mainly a top, but he dabbles in switching positions. Like if someone realllllyyyy wants to top he’ll be like “okay :)”

Noel is definitely just a top, and he tried being the bottom once and was content to not try it again (even if Oscar was patient and gentle). Although he does top, he’s not much for penetrative sex. He has some problems getting like, physically aroused (also aforementioned preferences- he’s a bit of a voyeur, he’s got those monsterfucker tendencies, whatever the fuck he and the butcher had going on) and therefore likes to get creative with it. He definitely likes to have a bit of control during sex, not being possessive but just being in the lead.

Oscar is mainly still a bottom but I think he can switch it up if he wants because he’s hot like that. Im pretty sure this might directly contradict my earlier statements, b u t- it took him a while to be comfortable being the top, because he’s had very negative connotations with that position. He didn’t like the idea of the power imbalance during sex it could make, and that he’d be the one creating it. With enough patience tho he was willing to give it go with someone he trusted (Noel probably, and although that didn’t do much for Noel he was still great at giving pointers). Annddd I think that’s why I like bottom John and top Oscar together bc they’re going against their usual preferences and trusting the other to give them something they don’t usually get.

I feel bad for writing whole paragraphs for Noel and Oscar and jarthur just gets to share a single sentence um OOPS- uhhh o k a y

John! a switch with top preferences! he gets really aggressive with Arthur but that’s just because Arthur matches his energy. I think he also talks a lot during sex, mainly giving affirmations and praise. With Noel tho- if he’s still human then they’re just having a teasing match. Noel likes to bring out the flirt and get under John’s skin, and John is trying so hard to keep up without just being an ass. Monster John and Noel tho? all bets are off and they’re getting real freaky with it. John still makes sure to be careful and check in often incase he does something that might hurt Noel. And Noel’s like sweetheart I don’t caarrrrreeee pleaassseeee get those tendrils around me. And with Oscar he’s verrrryyyyy careful. Like he could most definitely get more rough with him, but he doesn’t want to do something wrong and have Oscar never want to be near him again. So he’s real gentle, placing more emphasis on foreplay and closeness than actual sex.

and Arthur! the guy I think about the least somehow! sorry king! a switch that is a horny little freak at heart. He’s up for a lot of things and will be down to try anything if his partner thinks they’ll like it. He’s definitely got more of a dominant personality, and I think that’s verryyy evident with, surprise surprise, Parker! Those two had some wweiirrdddd dynamics going on and thought of flirting and sex like some kinda secret game they both wanted to win. Arthur gets manipulative sometimes, but only if he knows the other person would enjoy it. I think since he’s aro, he’s got less romantic attachment to sex, and thus just really likes having sex to unwind or have some fun.

OUG I RAMBLED TOO HARD SORRY I’ll leave